Thursday, October 31, 2013

Tea Party Speak

Republican apostate Mike Lofgren has written an addendum to The Devil’s Dictionary. Here are some of the entries:
Class warfare: a technique by which teachers, nurses, firemen, and cashiers are believed to be oppressing derivatives traders and CEOs, which includes unreasonably complaining that their wages aren’t keeping up with the cost of their health insurance.

Conservative: a person profoundly respectful of heritage, tradition, and old-fashioned values while preaching the revolution and strip-mining the Grand Canyon for high-sulfur coal.

Darwin’s theory of evolution: an evil doctrine that denies the teachings of the Bible. Social Darwinism, on the other hand, is what made America great and is perfectly consistent with the Sermon on the Mount.

Tea Party: people covered by Medicare who hate socialized medicine.

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