Secretary of Defense Robert Gates told members of the Senate Appropriations Committee on Wednesday that the military may soon have to resort to doing “stupid things” unless Congress passes a $33 supplemental spending request.
The Senate already approved a measure, but the version in the House has stalled. With funding for the Navy and Marine Corps set to dry up next month, Gates called on the lower chamber to get its act together.
“We begin to have to do stupid things if the supplemental is not passed by July 4,” he said.
God forbid the Pentagon should resort to doing stupid things. It’s much better to give them enough money to keep doing all the smart things we’ve come to expect. Say, for example, conducting a manhunt for WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange, who supposedly has a videotape showing the military doing yet another smart thing, namely, bombing and killing 140 civilians in the Afghan village of Garani last year. And let’s not forget their sluggish and largely futile offensives in Helmand and Kandahar provinces, the former of which was described by Stanley McChrystal himself as a “bleeding ulcer.” Surely Congress can cough up an extra $33 billion to maintain such radiant displays of brilliance?
Just imagine what would happen if the Pentagon was forced to stop these smart things and adopt stupid policies instead. One shudders at the prospect.