I Voted

The only tangible benefits I've ever received from voting are jury duty and those silly "I Voted" stickers.

What's the deal with those, anyway? It's like we're sixth graders getting a gold star on our papers for acing a spelling test. There's something worse about people who show them off by sticking them on their hats or shirts, as if that makes them more special than non-voters, I voted -- what did you do, huh? It's a cheap, puerile way for people to feel superior.

Big deal. Not voting is also a vote. It's a way of voicing discontent. George Carlin, as always, was the best on this subject. He didn't vote, he said, which meant he wasn't responsible for putting any of those assholes in power. Those of us who played ball and participated in what is largely a sham had only ourselves to blame when some crook got into office and ripped us off. Therefore, it was he, not us voters, who had the right to complain. Touche, Master Carlin, touche!

Regardless, I'll be voting anyway. I always do. I might even sweet talk one of the poll workers into giving me a handful of those stickers. I'll plaster them all over my "God Bless America" baseball cap when I go to jury duty, which I have to do on December 1st.