Looking Backward

The people crowded over the old man to hear his dying words. He was on his back, shriveled and bony and gray, like a dried-out lizard lying belly-up in the sun, gasping for breath and struggling to speak. Everyone quietly leaned forward to hear what he had to say.

The oldest man in the world, the only surviving link to the twentieth century, was about to speak his last, and the ragged people of 2110 were eager to hear his words. What wisdom did this fading relic of America’s final decades have to give? Surely this man who’d lived in better times had some something helpful to tell them?

Shivering and dirty, they huddled ever closer, afraid to touch him lest he dissolve like ancient parchment in their hands. He coughed, they jumped; he gurgled, they gasped; he moaned, they sighed. They feared it was too late.

Then, suddenly, the old man shot up and spoke. His ghostly voice broke out in song, and the people heard the glorious souls of their ancestors come to life:

Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there!

The best part of waking up is Folgers in your cup!

Nationwide is on your side!

The effects of Botox may spread hours and weeks after injection causing serious symptoms. Alert your doctor right away as difficulty swallowing, speaking, eye problems or muscle weakness can be signs of a life-threatening condition. Side effects may include allergic reactions, neck and injection site pains, fatigue and headache. Don’t take Botox if there’s a skin infection. Tell your doctor your medical history, muscle or nerve conditions and medications, including botulinum toxin, as these may increase the sign of serious side effects.

Don’t take your chronic migraine laying down. Stand up!