Just Fall Off The Wagon, Rick!

Here’s an interesting bit from Raw Story:

In an interview that aired on CNN Wednesday night, Republican presidential candidate Rick Santorum told Piers Morgan that he had smoked marijuana while in college.

“I admitted back when I was running for the Senate that when I was in college I smoked pot, and that was something I did when I was in college, and it was something that I’m not proud of, but I did it,” he said. “And it is something I wish I hadn’t done, but I did and I admitted it and would encourage people not to do so.”

My first thought while reading this was, Rick Santorum went to college?

But seriously, somebody give that man a bong rip. I’ll even pay for it. America would be a better place if Santorum started blazing up again, maybe even passed some around to his Christian pals. They might discover that there are more enjoyable ways to spend your life than attempting to persecute other people. More enlightening too.

I envision an America where Rick Santorum is stoned. Everything is basically the same. The rich are still rich, the poor are still poor, and the middle class is still an anxious, debt-ridden wad of sinking misery. America is still declining, our political class is still corrupt, wars are still raging, and nobody, at least to anyone’s knowledge, wants to marry a box turtle. Only one thing is different: there is one less pro-life, anti-gay, evangelical right-wing Republican in the land, and I like that. It’s a real swell thought.

But there’s no use brooding about impossible contingencies, is there? He gave up weed, found Christ, and became a politician. Poor us.

See what sobriety gets you?